Chapter 9
I cleared my head and looked around me for no reason. No one
was here. No one could stop me if I opened it. Something metal
clinked about inside as I turned the box all around examining
it. It made me all the more curious as the entire thing didn't
sound metal. Part of it thumped against the inside of the box
as well.
What harm could it do just to see what it contained? Velren's
comparison to Pandora's box kept my hand at bay though. Could
just a little viewing let loose all sorts of havoc amongst the
vampires? Yet I remembered the old myth and knew even with all
the evil in the box there at the bottom was hope. There's
always good to counterbalance evil. It should be the same in
this case.
I had never had an opportunity to open it and take a peek
inside before now. Even before Erik's death I had forgotten it
and so had allowed it to go to waste. I hoped that he did not
need it. What if it had been something he could have used to
stay alive? I felt guilty now. Perhaps I shouldn't keep it
here hogging it all to myself. Of course, if I didn't know what
was inside, how could I not know how to handle it?
A thought struck me that I shouldn't open it. It was only in
my keeping. A feeling of apprehension overcame me. The box was
dangerous. I shouldn't open it. I should give it to someone
better equipped to handle it than I.
No, these were not my thoughts, not my feelings. Heremon's
voice echoed in my head. "Do not open it."
"Go away Heremon." I pushed with little effort. He and my
misgivings disappeared.
I began to examine the box. It reminded me of the metal lunch
boxes I had as a kid. Well, it wasn't exactly the same but the
embossed patterns were similar and the metal seemed as thin.
The embossing was fairly random and not much more than 1/16th of
an inch high. Heck I swear I could make out Donald Duck on one
side. I began to wonder what it looked like on the inside.
A stronger hand gripped my mind and stayed my hand from opening
the box. "Antoniette, put the box down." Heremon had gone
running to the Queen and she now tried to take control over me.
"I order you not to open it."
Hell no! I wasn't going to be swayed that easily if it was
this important to them. The Queen's attempt was halfhearted. I
let her believe she had won by putting the box on the dresser.
I then laid down on the bed. I waited them out for several
hours while slowly building up my defenses.
I set up my barricade so that no one save Keir and the King
could force their way in my mind. Strangely enough Keir didn't
try to stop me. This more than anything persuaded me that it
was okay to do what I was about to do. If my genitor thought it
was okay, then it must be.
Before anyone else could try to stop me, I attempted to lift
the lid. It was locked with an old rusted padlock but it didn't
take much for me to pry it open. The timeworn hinge snapped.
Slowly I lifted the lid as if I expected something to come
popping out. It would not have surprised me for Erik to leave
me a box of springy snakes. The lid opened without incident and
I found myself staring at a book.
It was an unmarked volume bound in leather and seemed to
predate most volumes we had in the library. I was afraid to
touch it in case it crumbled in my fingers. I managed to lift
it out without damaging it. It had a metal lock on it that must
have been the metal scraping I heard within. I looked back in
the box. It was completely empty, no key to fit the lock.
A book? That was what was so precious? Yet I knew nothing
here was ever as it seemed. No doubt it was what the paper
inside had written on it that was so important. A treasure map?
No, too cliché. The truth of the origin of the vampires? Nah,
they didn't care about that. Magic spells? Yeah, now I'm just
fantasizing. It must be some long hidden secret. Perhaps about
the King that keeps him in power, thus no one wants me to know
of it.
After all I was the one who was supposed to kill him. If there
was something in here about him that could help me they'd want
to keep it from me right? Yes, that would be precious to some.
I examined the lock. It ran the length of the fore-edge. I
could not pry it open without seriously damaging the book. That
would be a travesty to such a beautiful relic as it. There was
but a small oddly shaped hole in the lock. I could see no way
to pick it as not only couldn't I fit a tool in there but there
didn't seem to be a mechanism to trip. I wondered if the
mechanism was somewhere up the length of it. Could it be
magnetic? Of course where could I find a magnet to try?
Stupid. They told me not to open it. What good had that done?
The box is open and now I'm right back where I started. All
the searching, all the pathetic begging, for nothing!
Ugh! I threw the book on the bed in frustration. It bounced
hard and came to a rest towards my pillows but not before a slip
of paper fluttered out of it and onto the ground. I checked
quickly to make sure the book was not damaged. Luckily, it
didn't seem hurt by the action. The lock wasn't either.
Sighing I picked up the slip and looked at the lightly scrawled
words. "Search out Netikerty."
"What?!" I hadn't the faintest idea what that meant. I
crumpled the paper and chucked it against the wall with another
grunt. I needed to hit something!
Netikerty? Who the hell was Netikerty and why would I need to
search her out?
Her? How'd I know it was a person? Somehow I believed it was
a vampire. What would she have to do with this?
Wait a minute… My memory much more accessible than it used to
be found a reference to the name in my past. Urquhart mentioned
her once. He told me she had done research on the prophecy
before him. I now had a lead and I would search out Urquhart!
***
Urquhart wasn't in his room and his room was locked. I knew he
must have some information on her. Perhaps it wasn't all in his
memory. He must have a book about or by her in there somewhere.
Anything that might give me a clue as to what she could do for
me. So I did what came naturally, and what I couldn't do to the
book. I picked the lock.
I could hardly get in the door there were so many books piled
around it. I squeezed in and picked up the first on the closest
pile. It wasn't by her. I quickly flipped through the pages
seeing no reference to her. She was not even mentioned in the
bibliography section. I placed it down and went to the next
one. This was going to take a while.
***
I scanned every book in his room and hopefully left it in a
similar state as when I started. Not that I thought Urquhart
would notice. I wondered if I went to talk to him Urquhart
might give me some answers. Of course he hadn't been very
forthcoming the last time I questioned him directly so I decided
to put that off until I had no other choice. I thought about
searching the library next but figured it would be more
efficient to do a search of the intranet first. Perhaps it
could tell me if she even wrote a book. More likely it would
have information on her research or someone who knew her.
Either might lead me to the answers.
I'm not sure how many hours I was in Urquhart's room but I know
it was enough to make me thirsty. I wondered if I had missed an
appointment. I quickly reached out to Victoria and found I had.
Chuck had given up looking for me hours ago. I'd have to
remind her I knew him too well to want to feed from him, though
I wasn't too afraid of killing him. It didn't matter since he
was busy clearing some clogged drains so I had her reschedule
him for a little later. I'd make do for now.
I approached my room. While this area usually had very few
thoughts bouncing around it -- one of the reasons I liked being
away from all the others -- there were thoughts now. These
weren't just random everyday thoughts, but thoughts about a
surprise and me. There were several people close by but only
the humans allowed their thoughts to leak out.
Lacey was overly enthusiastic about something, as usual. Was I
to be ambushed in my own room? Would I be punished for opening
the box after all? Luckily, I had taken it with me and stashed
it away where even I wouldn't think to look (which had the
unfortunate side effect of me probably forgetting where I
stashed it). I mustn't think of that now, for they must be
monitoring my thoughts because they quieted down. Was that
paint I smelled? It wasn't excessively strong but it was there.
What exactly was going on in there?
I slowly opened the door and peeked inside the crack. It was
dark inside. To get the jump on them I threw the door open and
went into a defensive stance. At the same time Kama, Lacey,
Chuck and Bram yelled, "Surprise!" When I got my bearings I had
to double-check that I was in the right room.
This wasn't the dark, spartan, ugly, empty, boring hole I had
left it. It was a brightly lit -- once Kama flipped the switch
-- colorful, inviting, fun, luxury apartment. I had a plush
couch, matching chairs, a bar set and new bedroom set. You'd
think in this small room all the furniture would make it
crowded. Quite the contrary. It looked roomier, not to
mention, cozier than ever. I was, to say the least,
flabbergasted.
My eyes focused on the largest wall. There was a full mural of
a castle on a hill, a dragon in a distant wood and high on a
cliff overlooking all: a knight and his maiden. The maiden's
dress looked familiar, much like the one in the painting Kama
made for Bram recently. I could almost hear the knight and
maiden talking through the sands of time.
"Will you come presently?" He said excitedly.
"Whither to my lord?" She said.
"Why to Camelot of course."
The castle most certainly looked as if it could be Camelot.
Majestic, solidly built, and beautiful with its gold trimming
and bright colors. The thing took up nearly half of the wall.
I felt as if I was there.
Somewhere hidden in the walls was a stereo system playing soft
Celtic music. It was an upbeat song with big bass drums and
dulcimer (a distinctive sounding string instrument I recognized
from music Bram bought for the jukebox). Was that the sound of
birds chirping too? Or was it my imagination? I felt as if I
was outside, like I was free!
"Well, don't stand there with your chin on the ground. What do
you think?" Lacey asked.
"This is great guys! Thank you!" I finally found my voice. I
hugged each of them but lingered in Bram's arms the longest.
"Well, now that all the hard work is done, let's party!" Chuck
stepped behind the bar and popped open a bottle of champagne.
***
A while later Lacey had another vampire to serve. I sent Chuck
on his way without feeding from him. I wasn't as hungry as I
thought. Kama made it known, nonverbally, that she wanted to
speak with me alone. Bram, however didn't want to leave. He
wanted to make up for his inaction in the sparing room earlier.
"You already have." I hugged him again but not for very long
hoping he'd get the message.
Kama was the deciding factor. "Bram, be a dear. I want to
discuss girl stuff with Antoniette. It's likely to bore the
demon out of you." Her winning smile did it and he left me
again, but this time I let him kiss me on the way out.
Kama didn't wait for him to be out of earshot or brain wave
shot or whatever. Of course he wasn't the type to eavesdrop.
"He's a good man."
"Yes, he is."
Kama and I went back inside and we sat together on the new
couch that faced the mural. She appeared to be gathering her
thoughts so I didn't bother her. I stared off into the painting
and wondered how they could have painted the whole thing so
fast. I was only gone half a day or so. No doubt they had
developed quick drying paint along with all the other technical
marvels here.
"So what do you really think?" Kama asked softly. I knew she
referred to the room.
"It's lovely. I really appreciate all the work you guys put
into it."
"But…?"
"No, no buts. Yeah, the fabric on the furniture wouldn't be my
first choice, but there's nothing wrong with it."
"It's just you don't seem unduly enthusiastic."
"Don't I? I love it really. It's just I've had other things
preoccupying my mind."
"You should mention that to Bram. He was a bit disappointed.
It was his idea after all, though I suggested the mural. He
really was the inspiration for it all."
"I'll be sure to give him a special thank you then." I said
with a bit of a telling grin.
She grinned too but only halfheartedly. Obviously there was
something else she wanted to talk about. "How's he doing?"
"Bram? He seems to be happy."
"No, no. Kenneth. I know I hurt him. I just want to know if
he hates me."
She couldn't read his mind to find out herself?
"Have you forgotten I've told you it's rude to invade other's
minds."
Of course it's different if she does it.
"I'm not doing it. You're projecting. Now Antoniette, let's
have a pleasant, normal conversation here."
I put a quick bubble up around my mind before my next thought
hit. I wasn't sure if I wanted her to hear it or not, then I
decided she needed to. "What's so normal about vampires
treating their slaves like lovers and their lovers like dirt?
Kenneth has devoted his life to you and suddenly you act like
you don't love him anymore."
"Exactly. I can't have him clinging to me all the time. I
have needs as well. I have feelings for him. It's true.
Here's the thing; he's just a passing phase. Ten, twenty years
at the most, he'll be gone."
"Twenty years is a long time."
"You're new at this dear, so you don't understand. To me
twenty years is nothing. It is a little drop in a series of
memories spanning hundreds of years. To me it seems as if
you've only recently arrived."
"I've been here five years!"
"And have they not gone by quickly?"
I thought about torture after torture I've been through. "No."
"Give it a century. You'll hardly even remember your human
life. Now, we were talking about Kenneth. Please do me a
favor."
I knew what she was about to ask. She may have shields up but
some things were still clear. "Listen, there are some things I
can't fix. He loves you, but he's confused right now. If I
tell him you want to break it off completely he may wind up
hating you."
"He's your friend. You can make him understand. It's better
this way."
"For whom Kama?" Selfish bitch. Kenneth's words echoed in my
head but I controlled myself. "Look, can't you consider a
compromise? Don't spend as much time with him, but don't
ostracize yourself from him."
"It is all or nothing Antoniette." Her thoughts made that much
clear.
"All or…?" It clicked finally. Twenty years was not long
enough. "The King's denied him suboriri."
She didn't say a word. "He will not be considered at this
time." Her memory of the King's sentence said it all for her.
"Oh that's good of you. You love him and you want to submit
the poor guy's soul to eternal damnation? Did you ever consider
that he might not want that, or at the very least isn't ready
for it yet. Give the guy some time."
"Don't you lecture me Antoniette. You have Bram forever.
That's heaven."
"I also have Keir and Heremon for the same length of time.
That's hell."
"You won't have Keir forever."
"Huh?"
"You'll kill him." She said it so matter-of-factly that it
took me a moment for it to sink in.
"Oh you can see the future now?"
"I know you and I know the prophecy. You will kill the King.
Keir will challenge you for the title as King."
"He can have it."
"No, he won't let you off that easily. You will have to kill
him. Better to kill him before you kill the King and have that
much less to worry about."
"I don't want to worry about anything." I leaned back into the
folds of the couch. "What about Kenneth? Do you have to kill
anyone to get him?"
"Maybe you, if you won't let me have him, your Majesty."
"Shut up."
We left it at that, she wasn't willing to compromise and so
Kenneth would have to bear the brunt of her decision. I'm sure
she'd learn to live without him, but I wasn't so sure about
Kenneth. No matter how it may seem to have changed, the reality
is humans meant very little to the vampires.
I knew she was done with that subject so I tried to move on.
"Um… Mistress?"
"Yes." There was something soft and melodic in her voice, as
if she already knew what I was going to ask, which of course she
did.
"Did… Bram…" I couldn't finish.
"No, he never asked for your suboriri. He would never do that."
"Has he…" Again I was tongue tied. This time she let me
finish asking the question though. She was good at that, always
making me build up the confidence I needed. "Has he seemed
different to you since-"
"Since you came here, definitely. He is less belligerent and
more patient. You've created a center of calm for him."
It tempted me to ask for more explanation, but I'm not sure I
wanted it. "I meant since my… suboriri."
She thought about it a moment. I saw her play a few memories
over in her mind. Nothing stayed long enough for me to make any
sense of it. "Not that I've noticed."
"It's just… He seems… I don't know. Lost. Like he doesn't
know how to treat me."
"Have you spoken to him about it?"
"No! Good Lord! What would I say? 'Don't you like me now as
a vampire?'"
She rolled her eyes. She was thinking that I tell her how to
deal with her relationship but I couldn't handle my own. I knew
with things like this you always needed the perspective of
someone else. When you're in a relationship you're too close to
it to see what you need to do. "Pamper him." That wasn't quite
what I expected. "If he still acts distant, ask him what more
you can do to make him happy."
"Gee, thanks." Kama smiled a slightly evil smile.
"Anything for you, my dear. Well, I had best leave." She
stood to go. "You will speak with Kenneth won't you."
"Yes, but not today."
"Why not? He is nearly here."
I'd known this for some time and had stalled her a little so
they could talk on their own. Of course, she caught on. "I
know, but we have other things to do."
"Oh." Her words weren't jealous sounding but I know what she
pictured in her mind and she didn't like it.
"It's nothing like that." I admitted. By this time we were
out the door and Kenneth was close enough to hear us so she
didn't respond.
"Oh you're here." Kenneth's thoughts were clear: he figured
Kama was giving him the cold shoulder so he would as well. He
ignored her after that. He missed the hurt expression that
flashed across her face and thoughts.
"I've come for my lesson." He said to me.
"Lesson?" Kama asked in my head. I could feel her heart
thumping in anxiousness about being here with him and now there
was a tinge of jealousy. She poked at my little protective
bubble. It didn't so much pop, as leak out a little information
for her that was on the top of my mind. "What's this about
teaching him mind control?"
"Who's invading whose mind now?" I snapped back in her head.
"You're going to teach him how to block me from reading his
mind!? Teach him to shut me out completely?!" She was simply
flabbergasted.
"I'm going to teach him how to protect himself from malicious
attacks. If that's how you think of your mind probes then I
guess so."
Meanwhile, Kenneth stood there awkwardly. He could feel the
tense atmosphere between us. I came to the conclusion, now
wasn't exactly the best time for any of this. I tried to weasel
out of the situation. "I should just let you guys hang here and
talk. I have to go find Bram."
"Don't you leave me alone with him." Kama ordered in my head.
"What? Why not?" I replied in the same manor.
"What's wrong?" Kenneth asked.
I've never been a good liar. Half of the reason is I can't
control my facial expressions well. While I wasn't exactly
lying, not keeping part of the conversation from him was close
enough, and I'm sure the confusion on my face showed at that
moment. I just didn't have the centuries of practice that Kama
had as she covered smoothly for my faux pas.
"I was expecting Toni to return with me for a threesome with
Oscar. However, she says she's promised you this lesson and
refuses to go with me. It's not the first time I've been
disappointed today. So, I shall leave you to your work."
"Kama!" I tried to call out but she was already gone.
Kenneth stood there staring at me. He wasn't sure if he should
say something or wait for me to explain what just happened.
Neither happened, I gestured inside my room.
Once he entered he said, "Wow!"
"Yeah, Kama and others thought they'd surprise me with this."
"Is she okay? She seemed kind of upset."
I didn't really want to answer that so I changed the subject.
"Why don't you lie down on this couch? It's quite comfortable.
I'll turn off the music."
"Did you talk to her about me?"
"Kenneth, let's just try to concentrate on one thing at a time.
Discussing Kama will unfocus your mind and you won't be able to
do this."
"Oh." He said softly, disappointed.
I took him through the first few steps Bram put me through,
building up a bubble. We didn't get very far at all. His mind
kept returning to Kama. This obviously wasn't going to be as
easy as when Bram taught me.
***
"Are you guys done with your girl talk?" Bram leaned on the
wall just down the hall with a crooked smile.
"Been done for some time." I shrugged.
"Good. I want to show you something."
"Not another fighting lesson I hope."
"No, but this is slightly related to survival."
"Oh, be still my beating heart." I said as I allowed him to
lead me down the hall.
Bram held my hand all the way to the garage. He took me to a
corner of the room and showed me a door. I wouldn't have
noticed it even if it didn't blend so well with the wall. "This
is where the keys are kept."
Faster than the blink of an eye, but a motion easily caught
with my vampire senses, Bram concentrated on something far away.
"So whom do we contact to open it?" I asked as I realized what
he was doing. At the same time the door slid up into the
ceiling.
"His name's Jaques." The name brought back a memory from long
ago, a campfire ghost story, an insane vampire and death. "You
don't really need to though. He's always watching."
I halfway caught those ominous words as I was still absorbed in
the memory. "Is it true?" "What that he eats vampires?" He
said not giving me a chance to say it. "No." Then with a
dramatic tone. "At least… I don't think so."
"Ha, ha." I playfully slapped him on the arm since he was
trying to scare me.
"Actually, he's a good guy, if not a little distracted."
"How come I haven't seen him?"
"You should know. He's downstairs. I've never even seen him.
Only in here." He tapped his head. By now he had grabbed a set
of keys and we were walking among the cars, until we came to the
Lamborgini. He handed me the keys.
I slid the door up and lowered myself until I was almost lying
down. I felt the familiar leather steering wheel. I started
her with ease and she purred to life.
"Shouldn't we bring a slave?"
"We're not going very far, or for very long. I just wanted to
get some fresh air."
Hmm… If Jaques is always watching then he knows we're in the
car. I wonder if I thought about the garage door opening- What
do you know, it did.
That's kind of scary actually. Then again, I've always known
there's no such thing as privacy around here. What else did he
watch?
I made a mental note to redouble my efforts with Kenneth.
I drove fast. It's not as if I either of our lives were
endangered. More than that, I felt I could handle anything that
might pop out at me. When I was human, my reflexes were slow
and now, without ever really experiencing it, I knew I could
react when needed to and still safely stay on the road. I still
didn't understand why Bram nor any of the other vampires didn't
learn how to drive. This was fun.
There was an eighteen wheeler up ahead and I swerved around him
as if he wasn't moving. Out of the corner of my eye I saw Bram
grab hold of the dashboard very tightly. He didn't say a word.
He was wondering why he didn't choose the Pinto instead.
After he calmed down a little he indicated to me our normal
lookout. We never spoke a word aloud. There was no one here
that needed to hear them.
I came to a skidding stop perfectly in the middle of the
pullout. The sound of small pebbles against the metal roof made
me rethink the stunt in the future. I'd hate to see this car's
paint chipped let alone any other damage done to it.
Bram held my elbow helping me out of the car, as if I needed
help, but he was being a gentleman so I let him. "So what did
you and Kama talk about?"
"Hmm?" His gentlemanly behavior fascinated me so I didn't
really know what he was talking about.
"After we painted your room." He prompted.
"Oh, nothing. Just her feelings for Kenneth."
"Are they like your feelings for me?" He asked without a hint
of a smile.
I smiled though. "You're always so serious."
"Yes, some think I need to lighten up a bit. You still haven't
answered my question."
"She loves him." I said simply.
"Ah." Like a typical man he clamed up when the word Love
entered the picture.
I imagined us having a conversation about how Kama's
relationship with Kenneth was similar to ours. I looked for the
opening to tell him how I felt he'd grown distant over the last
weeks. It never came. He stared out to the dark grass and
night rolling by.
"Is something wrong?" I asked him.
"No." He squeezed my hand assuredly. "Come on. This way."
He looked towards the horizon now. "There's something I want to
show you."
We moved so fast I didn't really get a chance to take it all
in. So when we reached the apex of the hill I stood in wonder.
The world was the same but yet now so different, so beautiful.
The colors, even though there was only light from a cloud,
covered, half moon, were brilliant and diverse. It's as if
someone turned up the brightness and contrast on the TV. I
could see individual blades of grass. The sparse bushes were an
iridescent green. The sky was a deep navy blue. It never
became fully black. The clouds took on many different gray
hues.
No birds sang this late at night, but all sorts of insects
performed a symphony for us. Every now and then I could hear
the croak of a toad. Had it strayed or could I hear all the way
to the pond I knew to be almost a mile from this spot?
The tangy smell of cow dung, while prevalent mixed with
hundreds of other smells, many of which I didn't recognize.
Most were definitely vegetative, a little like the smell of
freshly cut grass but with a cottonwood edge to it. A slight
breeze pricked my hairs on edge and I caught a whiff of rain on
the air. There was something else too, coming from Bram's
direction. Pheromones?
I smiled at him. "A very romantic night."
"Um hm." He wrapped his arms around my shoulders and kissed my
neck.
"It's going to rain."
"You won't melt."
We stood there for quite a while. He knew what it was like to
be out for the first time.
About twenty minutes later, we hadn't moved, and the rain
caught up to us. It was soft hardly a drizzle. Still the soft
droplets reverberated down my body. It had been so long since
I've experienced this phenomena that I was in awe. The dark
clouds had muted all the colors around me and the water washed
away most of the smells. Even the insects seem to have gone
into hiding as the water came down in bigger drops.
My muscles slackened as each drop massaged them. My hair now
fully covered my eyes and the rain patted my head. I love the
rain! I came this close to taking off my clothes and dancing in
it. Bram no doubt would have loved that. I felt a bit of self
restraint was in order.
Perhaps it was because I felt something wasn't right. Bram was
not happy. There was a bit of nostalgia about him.
"You okay?"
"Yes, fine." He lied. He even tried to give me a fake smile
when I looked back at him.
"I'm sorry."
"What?"
"This isn't what you expected is it? When I became a vampire.
You didn't think I'd be so weak like I was in the sparing room
against Keir."
"No, it's not that-"
"But I haven't met your expectations have I?"
"Toni, don't talk like that. It's not your fault…" He trailed
off.
"What's not my fault?"
"Nothing." He said softly.
"Bram." I warned. He no doubt already felt me probing his
memories.
"Fine!" He stopped me with a thought. "I figured with Keir's
blood you'd be stronger and I wouldn't have to protect you so
much. There, happy now?"
Not really. I'm sure there was something else, but I didn't
want to upset him more.
He began walking down the hill in the opposite direction we
came. I followed at a distance not wanting to question him.
We made our way across the rough dry grass and rocks. We
passed short bushes and small pines. We hadn't gotten very far
when I started to get a paltry feeling of foreboding. Something
was wrong. I tasted intruders in the air. Why were they here?
I must protect myself. Bram stopped me by putting a hand on my
arm. "It's not you." He said aloud.
Then I heard it. A quiet sound like a few pebbles shaking in a
small, plastic bottle. I realized what I was feeling was animal
instinct. The feelings and cogitation of a snake. It lunged.
Bram did some quick calculations. They were so clear I could
do just as he did and catch it before it got very far. I was
confused and afraid. If I wiggled- argh! I blocked out its
thoughts. It struggled violently whipping about, opening and
closing its mouth as if it thought it could strike. "Let it go
Bram."
I felt Bram's disappointment and saw in his mind that he
expected me to drink from it. He wasn't afraid of it. He felt
very little for the creature. Much as he feels for most humans.
"You should at least taste it, so you know you can survive off
them. Here take it." He didn't understand my disgust. I just
couldn't drink from such a pitifully helpless creature.
"I don't want it!"
"It's a matter of survival. It's either you or it and since
you're the vampire, then it's it."
"I would, if I needed to survive. Right now it's scared and I
don't need to."
"Of course." He slowly lowered the snake into the bush. It
didn't feel grateful at all in fact it tried to lung for Bram
but missed without me even seeing Bram move. With one swipe
Bram knocked it ten feet away. It landed hard on the ground and
then slithered away as we both cleared all aggression from it
and ourselves.
"I forget you still have compassion for them. It's been so
long since I've paid attention to their feelings.
"What happens if it does bite me and the blood-"
"It will die. Our blood is poisonous to most animals. Believe
me. It would never have a chance. Your reflexes are too fast
for it. You nearly would have caught it if I hadn't before
you." Not to disappoint him but I was ready to run not catch it.
We continued on our way and as we did so Bram explained,
"Animals aren't quite the same as ourselves, not as
sophisticated. We can only sense them close up within a few
hundred feet. There are some like horses, dolphin and whales,
maybe dogs and cats that we can almost communicate with. You no
doubt felt the fear in the snake?"
"And a little more."
"There's not much more to it, survival instincts mostly." Of
course I knew the thing didn't really think as we do. "Whatever
you felt from it translated into your own thoughts and feelings
that you could understand. There was probably a bit of
mistranslation in there or overcompensation.
"It can't understand our thoughts. We can't command weaker
animals as we can other humans. They just wouldn't understand.
Some are outside our 'frequency' range. Half of telepathy is
the object you're reading unconsciously transmits their
thoughts. You just have to be able to read them. It's like
when an extremely upset person enters a crowded room. Without a
word spoken just about everyone knows they're upset. Anyone can
pick up on it, but some can actually know why that person is
upset. Some of it is just instinctual. Where you just 'know'
things without being able to explain how you know. It's how you
knew the snake was about attack. Some people call it 'a sinking
feeling.'
"Other animals are too dumb to give much notice to the world
outside. Cows for instance."
He led me through the pasture to a small herd. I was grateful
to see no bull. I've been on my cousin's farm enough times to
have respect for the large animals and their horns. They didn't
pay much attention to us. I guess they've been around humans
quite a lot. There was no feelings coming from them at all,
other than I suddenly was hungry. Cows have four stomachs so I
figured they're always hungry.
"Cows taste better than snakes anyway." Bram said. "I suppose
it's because we become used to eating them as humans." He
shrugged as he petted the rump of one. He walked around it he
always kept one hand on it. I remembered my cousin's warning to
let the cow know you're there, and not to spook it otherwise you
could get kicked and that could be deadly. I suppose it would
just hurt a lot now.
He worked his way around to its neck and rubbed its nose. It
didn't seem to mind Bram at all. "See here." He pointed to a
bumpy part of the cow's neck. "That's the external jugular."
He got a good hold of the cow. He obviously expected me to
drink from it and wasn't going to take no as an answer this
time. "I have a good hold of it. They sometimes jerk if you
don't calm them well. I figure we'll work on that part later.
Go ahead and drink now."
I sighed as I saw no way out of this. I figured it would be
easier to not kill a large cow than the small snake. Hell, they
have more blood than we do so, why not?
I put a hand on its neck. I felt its muscles tighten and the
hairs bristle slightly. I know I would have never noticed the
change as a human.
"Shhhh." I petted its neck a little. Immediately the muscles
loosened and its eyes closed. If Bram wasn't holding it, I
wonder if it wouldn't have tried to lie down.
"I guess you don't need those calming lessons after all."
"I'm good with animals."
"Yeah, tell me that next time you get on a horse."
The large bay stallion appeared before me. I put my hand out
to pat his neck and he whinnied then stepped aside. "Come on
boy. Be nice." I tried to lay my hand on his muzzle and he
reared.
"Stop it!" I shook the memory out of my head and the cow was
there again. Bram chuckled and I gave him a cold stare. Still
the cow was mostly asleep and gently, hoping I didn't frighten
it out of this state I put my lips to its neck. I smelt the
blood and felt it pumping through the vein.
I lifted my lips exposing my teeth and felt my cuspids expand.
I plunged into the vein. Except I forgot where leather comes
from. With the thick skin protecting the vein I only managed to
scratch the surface and got a mouth full of hair. Bram chuckled
softly. He knew it would happen.
"Okay wise ass, what do I do?" I put into his head and tried
to retrieve the information without his consent.
I tried biting the cow twice more with no better results. Its
neck was just too flat and hide too thick. I was out of ideas
on approaches to take in piercing its skin and the effort was
making me hungry. I began to regret not drinking from the
snake. It would have been much easier than this.
Bram chuckled and reached down to his belt. He produced a
knife and handed it to me hilt first. "The dagger: a
survivalist's best friend. You can have mine."
I began to reach for it then stopped cold. It was about the
size of his hand and the worn wooden handle looked extremely
familiar. This had been the knife with which I had slit my
wrists years ago. "Where did you get that?"
I had just assumed it had disappeared as magically as it had
appeared. Bram had denied ever touching it. And now here it is.
"It's mine. I made it when I was a child." He was a little
confused at my reaction.
"But that's the knife that appeared in the closet. You said
you didn't know about it."
"I didn't know it was the same one. You never were clear on
what it looked like. It's never been off my person except when
I sleep." I knew he always kept a knife with him but it was
always in a sheath that hid it from view. Strange that I had
never questioned that before. "Perhaps you are mistaken."
I finally took it from him to look at it closer. There
obviously was no blood on it. The pommel was small dragon
carved very painstakingly; much care had gone into making and
maintaining it. Yet nothing could stop the wear of time upon
it. It fit into my hands nicely and I remembered the groves
made for the fingers upon the handle.
I wanted to believe Bram, but there was no denying that yes,
this was the same knife. "Could someone have taken it from you
and returned it without you knowing?"
He petted the cow as he thought. "Yes, I suppose it's
possible, but unlikely. Who would be foolish enough to?"
"Who would place it in the closet for me to kill myself with?"
He shook his head. Neither of us could think of someone who
would do either of those things. At one time, I had thought
whoever murdered Lowell had left it. While I knew Kama had
plenty of opportunity she had stopped me from committing suicide
at another time so it is unlikely to be her. Whom else then?
Not Keir, I'd already discussed it with him and I no longer
believe he ever wanted me to kill myself. Erik could also have
done it, but only as a joke. Nah, it couldn't have been him.
He would have put a prank knife in there.
"Toni, the cow." Bram struggled with the bovine as it began to
come out of its stupor. It acted as if it wanted to prance
around. I had completely forgotten the thing and right now I
wasn't interested in feeding from it. "Just calm it down a
little."
I petted its nose and made some shushing noises again. It
stopped moving and after a minute it decided to fold its legs
underneath it to lie down. We didn't have much choice but to
let it. It practically fell asleep as I continued to pet it.
"I want to process this dagger."
"There's nothing to process it for Toni. Do you really think
anyone who could have taken it would have left anything on it?"
He had a point. Even if they had been a little careless, its
been years since the event. Bram and I both have handled it and
thus any other trace evidence no doubt were removed long ago.
It wasn't that important anyway. Whoever wanted me dead missed
their opportunity. I started to hand the dagger back to Bram.
He indicated the cow. "Make a slight incision, not much more
than a prick will do."
I stared him down. He still wanted me to drink from the cow.
"Come on."
"You have to learn sometime."
Well, at least it wasn't a snake. I placed the knife gently
against its skin placing the tip over the bulging vein. I felt
the rise and fall of the pulse upon the knife. I took a deep
breath and prayed that I wouldn't hurt the cow.
I pushed lightly on the knife. Apparently I still didn't know
my own strength and it went in three quarters of an inch instead
of the eighth I meant to do. The cow didn't like it much. It
made a horrible crying sound and shook its head violently
knocking the knife several feet away. Bram and I both had
trouble keeping it from kicking and getting up. A red streak
ran down its neck and matted its brown coat. I caught a sniff
of fresh blood. Bram too tensed up. He fought lunging for the
wound to allow me room to get to it.
The free flowing blood pumped slowly as a cow's pulse is
slightly slower than ours. Though, the quantity that came out
with each pulse was greater than that with humans. So I got a
mouthful rather quickly. I feared what would happen if I hit an
artery on a cow.
I didn't allow the blood to rest upon my tongue for more than
half a second as more pushed its way in and I gulped it up until
I had my fill. It tasted somewhat suggestive of steak.
I began licking the wound until the blood began to coagulate.
The bovine seemed extremely relaxed, perhaps too much so. Her
eyes were closed and her breathing shallow. Bram gently lowered
her head to the ground. She sprawled out upon the ground.
"She will be all right, won't she?" I petted the cow's neck.
She didn't act as if she felt it. I only knew she was still
alive because I could still feel the blood flowing in her veins.
Strange how I've begun to feel a little connected to her.
"Yeah. The rancher will probably believe it was attacked by a
coyote or something, but it will be up and moving by tomorrow.
Cows recuperate fairly well, another reason we prefer them over
other animals. If you need to, there are other wild animals in
this area that you can feed off. Cows are just the easiest, but
there aren't many ranches here."
He stood brushing dirt off his knees and then helped me to my
feet. He bent back down to pluck the knife from the ground. He
began walking back towards the hill we had come.
Why didn't he wait for me? He seemed to be getting distant
again. Hell, he hardly even looked at me. I had to say
something, but I didn't know what. Before I could think of what
to say, he held the knife out to me hilt first.
"I would like you to take this."
I made no move to take it. I didn't want anything to do with
it.
"I know how you feel about it, but I would feel better if you
kept a knife with you, especially when you're out here. There
are far more dangerous things than rattlesnakes hiding in these
hills."
I was beginning to relent. His argument made a lot of sense.
However, having a weapon handy at all times could give me the
confidence needed to get me into a lot of trouble.
"Please take it until I can make you a new one." He was fairly
insistent. I wondered if he knew something I didn't about my
needing protection.
Finally I took it from him. His hands now free he began
removing the scabbard from his belt. I contemplated the fine
workmanship he had put into the dagger as only a youth. This
reminded me I knew so little of his past. "Bram…"
"Hmm…" He didn't look up.
"What was your life like, before you became a vampire I mean."
He looked towards the horizon. He pointedly kept his mind off
the question I had posed. "The sun is going to rise soon. We
had best begin heading back." He handed me the scabbard and
changed direction towards the car walking fast enough that I
could not easily talk to him as I tried to keep pace.
By: Christine Schnell
